funny tings we say

russell: ...let's ask emily.
lance: hey, emily!
emily: yeah?
lance does the SWAT team take care of problems in the no-fly zone?
emily: AAAAAAHHHHH!!!

dan: hi, i'll have a bowl of the lentil soup please.
iranian guy at espresso 22: sorry, i'm all out. i have potato.
dan: i see. is the potato soup vegetarian as well?
guy: if you want i can cut my finger off and put it in the soup! no, just kidding! it is vegetarian.

dave: i don't know if i want to study abroad for a whole year. i mean, that's a long time away from school. what if that's the year i'm going to meet my future wife?
classmate: what if your future wife's abroad?
dave: what if my future wife's a broad‽